Scrapped Verse from Anime (Ana Mae) [love sicc]

Basically, because I vowed never to speak of her [the BM] in my tracks, I yanked this verse before I even spit it BUT it's the only way I can tell the story in short form...

[Background: Anime is track from love sicc based on someone I loved but abused. At one point I was going to chronicle the 3 abusive relationships that I was in but, I decided to focus on the one I actually cared about... ]

Aggravated aphrodisiac
Would fight her in the streets AND THAT
Always seemed to lead to me creeping in the sheets to scrap
Beat her up twice a day
Figured out she liked the pain
So I tried to leave her -but conceived with the trifling dame
Still hitting her
STOPPED, tried to switch it up
That’s when she told me that I could go but the kids were stuck…
I didn’t give a fuck!
Starting swinging like I hated her
Middle-fingering God like “WHY’D YOU LET ME MATE WITH HER??!?!”
I’m ashamed of her
But still kept on banging her
When Animé came she told the DA I was raping her!
WHAT THE FUCK?!?
I was stuck
Facing thirty-five
Just because this duck
Is on my nuts
Saying dirty lies
She on the sideline begging me to come back
But Ike’s with Ana Mae now, ya dumb bitch, FUCK THAT

Miss You (pining 0.5 - 2)

Fuck if we aint kick it hard
Kid couldn't get a job, still you was wit it, I'm spittin, you printin business cards
Damn, I miss your heart, used to rest my head there
never thinkin next year, you would be my ex, yeah...
Where was I though? You used to make me comfortable, now I'm freezin cold at night, where did my covers go?
Where did my lover go? Damn I'm in trouble yo, cause since you left, straight stressed is my undertone
I still love you yo, I never tried to move on
I never missed a step, now it's hard to put my shoes on
You gone? It just doesn't sound right.
I hope I'm going deaf and just can't tell what love sounds like.
I drown mics, why can't I get your heart to pour?
Diamond in the rough. I miss being who you sparkle for.
Late nights and phone jonesing was the daily.
Now the fact that this is what I lack is what ails me.
Our tale seems far from over from where I'm standing.
I miss you, so come back home. I'm not asking. I'm demanding.

-- Sent from my Palm Pre

Freed

I used to be able to lie to myself.
I used to believe me.

Every time I said I wasn't special...
Everytime I said I wasn't amazing...
Everytime I said that I didn't deserve more...

I sure had me fooled.

Every barrier I let hold me back before, I have now shattered.

Every fantastic dream, I have brought into reality.

What I let them tell me was impossible, I have accomplished.

I've broken down their locked doors.

I've walked in their shoes, as they've refused to wear mine.

I've danced with the devil and played chords with the Gods.

I've done it all.

Then, just for kicks, I did it again.

I woke up and did everything they slept on.

I created opporunity out of adversity.

I stole the key to success and made copies for everyone around me.

I rode a long ride down a short path to destruction, and rebuilt myself.

I became FREE.

I freed my mind which freed my spirit.

My spirit freed my soul.

My soul freed my world.

My world freed... Me.

I can fly now.

Look, up in the sky. That's me.

Now that I know what I can do it's impossible to bind me again.

I'll never land.

Walking is for liars.

I've left my shoes for you......

-- Sent from my Palm Pre

Black Love has been destroyed....

I am enraged and I am saddened. I tremble as my vengeance brews.

Mark my words, dear scholars, I shall show you pain. Study well my friend, study well.

Destroy ME? Impossible. Your mind is not so clever.

I am energy. I am life. I am love. I am everything.

Destroy ME? How dare you wretches believe yourselves worthy of such a bold endeavor?

I am joy. I am vitality. I am peace. I am everything.

Destroy ME? Laughable, at best.

I am the thread of life's tapestry. I am the warm summer wind. I am the smile on an innocent face. I am everything.

Destroy ME? Surely, you jest.

I am the stone that shapes the diamond. I am the gravity that orders balance. I am the tie that binds. I am everything.

Destroy ME? A task fit for a fool.

I am grace. I am Heavensent. I am eternal. I am everything.

Destroy ME? A joke, so very cruel.

I am here. I am now. I am awakened. I am everything.

I am Black Pride. I am Black Unity. I am Black Love.

You have sent your slave ships.

You have sent your Plantation masters.

You have sent your Klansmen.

You have sent your Willie Lynch program.

You have sent discrimination, incarceration and degredation.

You have sent your crack epidemics.

You have sent in your propoganda experts to tarnish my image.

You have been at war with me for a long time now. You will never win.

I am a conductor on the Underground Railroad.

I am a Black Panther.

I am a P-Stone.

I am a Blood.

I am a Crip.

I am the RBG movement.

I am Soul Music.

I am R&B.

I am Hip Hop.

I am a Summer cook-out.

I am a family reunion.

I am the smile between neighbors who have never formally met.

I am the rally against police brutality.

I am the march against injustice.

I am the Dream.

I am the means necessary.

I am the reason the struggle continues.

I am him, I am her, I am all of them.

I am the uppity Negroes, the disrespectful Niggers and the onary Jigaboos.

I am intelligent.

I am beautiful.

I am real.

I will soon be recognized and you will have lost.

Destroy Black Unity you say? I beg you to tell me the punchline.

Destroy Black Love you say? I am tickled to no end.

Destroy Black Pride you say? I invite you to lose again.

Jump Off

She got my nose wide open; I’m taking new breaths
I want to walk down the aisle, straight off the two steps
- Dancing with a star. Romance. Isn't it odd?
I was trying to keep it moving, but she's living in my heart

Relax baby, unpack your baggage
We could make it disappear, this here's magic
One wave of the wand, a couple of words
And I could make you shiver like when trouble emerge;
- I want to hear you gasp when love fills you
Just to take it back and just feel you...
Vibrating -
Why wait when I'm aching?
It's your call though, I'm patient.
We could even start over, I'm Jason.
...pleasure meeting you
It’d be more pleasure seeing you

Off this dance floor, I'm thinking more just me and you
So we can explore all the pleasures I'ma bring to you
Steer my ship to your treasure, I would sink for you
Free diving in the middle of your ocean
Devotion - I swear I will move how you notion
You don't have to talk just float and stay focused
You could let it flow like the floodgates broken
Let’s make our own music like the club ain't open
I’ll work the strings... and the percussion too
Until I'm in tune with that tune that you humming to
….Then I'ma play it back twice
Tell me if the chords, the snares and the tap's right...

For real, I just want to be in synch baby
You’ve got to know that you drive me to the brink baby
We should jump off together, what you think baby?

;]
[;

Yes. It is your fault.

It IS your fault that you have flaws if you're not working to change them. For example "Is it my fault I'm an asshole?" Yes. Yes it is. (Don't get all hopeful that I'll change, I'm happy this way.) You're broke? Not "smart enough" (btw, smart enough for who? or what? I never understood that smart enough, cute enough, funny enough etc. hang up people have)? People don't like you? Whatever your ailment, how much effort are you putting in to relieving it? Use the gripe about it energy to do something about it. Stop sitting on the pot bitching and start shitting people! I’m tired of hearing “That’s just me, I can’t change it, oh well,” because it’s a lie. My solution = stay away from people who say that all the time. See… PROBLEM SOLVED!!! Anyway, I LOVE YOU ALL, even if I don’t LIKE you. Peace, Blessings and Prosperity to all.

How Many?

How many lines of wishes for a life of kissing my diamond princess? 

How many verses of "I deserve this" and nervous workings with word flips? 

How many dreams of scenes with my one and only Queen will I have seen? 

How many heart explosions while hardly knowing if it's smart to show this hard emotion? 

How many attempts at writing what's been kept inside me in text and rhyme scheme? 

How many "How Many"s does it take for her to say "I love you Jay" and just embrace the "us" we make? 

- I love you. Truly. -   

Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®

I'm dope

She said I'm dope...

I go beneath her surface and make her feel warm and relaxed. She nods off on me; I put her to sleep. She tries so hard to stay awake.

She said I'm dope...

She's chasing the feeling now. She wants me to take her away to that other world in outer space. She'd do anything just for a taste of a taste.

She said I'm dope...

She drools when I'm inside her. She gives me control of all of her senses. She can't speak or stand straight. She can't feel her face.

She said I'm dope...

There is no longer a "spot." Anywhere she puts me is where I make her feel good from. She says I'm crazy, insane... but she can't let me go I'm too deep in her brain.

She said I'm dope...

She red-lines to my Blue Magic. She gets sick when she can't have me. She needs me. Without me, her life is pain. I have got her open from every single vein.

She said I'm dope...

She's got the kind of track marks no tattoo can cover. I will always be a part of her now. She says I hit her like a train, but it's okay, she wants me anyway.

She said I'm dope...

I think I'll let her have me some more...
Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone with SprintSpeed

Breakfast in Bed II (Mini)

You are polyrhythmic, intrinsicly exquisite

Gifted with wisdom, a paradigm in True Religion

My favorite vision. I awake and in an instant -

I'm lifted. Floating on love, hungry for kisses.

My queen with coffee skin, and syrup sweet lips...

Good Morning. Would you please be my breakfast?

Her heartbeat

Fuck fireworks!
Every beat is like an H•Bomb landing
Giving life to my Hershey's Kiss Queen while she rotates my planets -
God damn it!
I've gotta hand it
to God for making passion,
lust, desire and love take form in physical fashion - everlasting

Like sweet liquored licorice
her lips make me miss a kiss I've never witnessed
- I'm twisted by this mistress!
My wish is to grant her wishes,
but all that exists is -
explicit visions broken by intermissions
- whenever real life kicks in.

I'd rather dream to her pulse rate
and fiend for her touch and taste
- than exist as a being in a scene minus her lovely grace

I'm enchanted by her beats per minute
trying to creep up in it,
painting pictures of paradise -
hoping she could see US in it.

Her heart's fire sparks desires that rises my blood pressure.
My eyes start to undress her -
A beat skips, we meet lips and my happiness lasts forever


Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone with Nextel Direct Connect